A milestone in Kyoto

Last weekend my husband and I made a snap decision to spend our saturday night in Kyoto. We left our house early saturday morning to take the bullet train and after just 2 hours, we arrived in Kyoto at 11am.

I have been to Kyoto several times and both my husband and I love this ancient capital of Japan a lot. Because we are so familiar with the city, we knew it was going to be a very relaxing trip for us. We spent the 2 days walking around the city, visited our favourite eating spots and enjoyed snow. Most importantly, our 3 year old added another milestone to his life. He went to bed that saturday night without his nappy and woke up in his clean and dry underwear for the first time. We can now declare him to be fully toilet-trained!!

It all started because we forgot to pack in his night nappies. Just as we were discussing on what to do for the "no nappy with night peeing" situation, Aiden requested that we let him sleep with his underwear on instead. He even said "I promise I won't pee in my underwear". So we let him try. I think the poor boy was so stressed that he went to pee 3 times in a span of 15 minutes just before bed!

So he woke up on Sunday morning proudly declaring that his underwear was clean and kept telling us that he did not want to wear bedtime nappies anymore. Until today, he has been telling everyone he met that he does not need night nappies anymore. My little baby is indeed growing up!

Enjoy the photos (I mean photos of our time in Kyoto, not my boy in his underwear)!

All photos were taken by my new Olympus Pen camera - a xmas gift from my hubby. I'm so loving my new toy!
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My little sweet talker

My three year old was looking at some old photos of me dressed in my wedding gown 5 years ago.

Aiden : "You looked pretty Mummy."

Me     : "Thanks Aiden."

Aiden (looking at me adoringly): "You still look pretty Mummy."

Me     : "Aww............ You are so sweet."

Moments like this make me forget how often he drives me up the wall.
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A moment to remember

My little 3 year old boy did something that touched my heart and brought a tear to my eyes tonight. And I have to pen it down in this journal so that I will always remember this special moment.

Aiden has been toilet trained for about 6 months but he is still on nappies at night. I have read and heard from many experienced mothers that boys generally take longer than girls to be fully toilet trained - day and night. In fact, many boys still incur "accidents" in bed right up to the age of 10 (omg)! Hence with Aiden, I really haven't been too fussed about training him at night. I figure that he will just do away with night nappies when he is ready, whenever that may be.

Now, the problem started a couple of nights ago. I don't know what the reason is, but his pee has been leaking out of his nappy and wet the bed in the middle of the night. For 3 nights in a row. And it drove me crazy. We do not have a protector for his matteress as we haven't been able to find one in Japan so imagine the work I have to do when he wets his bed at night. The standard operating procedure for wet bed situation is this:

•  All his soft toys have to be cleared from his bed
• the sheets have to be off and washed
• the quilt cover has to be pulled off and washed
• the quilt has to be cleaned and left on the balcony to dry and air
• the dirty patch on the matteress has to be cleaned (a damn hard chore by the way)
• his pyjamas has to be soaked before they can be washed with other laundry
• clean new sheets to be put on again at night before he goes to bed

And it happened 3 days in a row! All of the above chores multiply by 3! Seriously, all I remember doing for the past few days is washing. MANY loads of washing.

So my husband and I decided to tell Aiden that he can no longer pee in his nappy by explaining to him that he is growing up so fast that his nappy can no longer hold the increased quantity of pee. He took it well and was even guilty of the fact that he wet his bed and made a mess.

This morning, my husband woke up and discovered that the toilet door was ajar and the lights were on. Aiden was still asleep in his room so my husband asked if I used the toilet in the middle of the night, which I didn't. So Aiden was the one who used it! We asked his later in the day and he admitted waking up to use the toilet as he needed to pee. We were so proud of him as we really didn't expect a 3 year old to remember waking up from his sleep to use the toilet just becasue we told him to.

But the special moment was tonight. After reading to him and turning off the lights, I asked if he needed to use the toilet. He said he didn't need to and I reminded him to try not to pee in his nappy when he sleep. Then I left him to go downstairs. Our bedrooms are all on 2nd level and Aiden knows his dad and I are still downstairs watching tv while he is alone upstairs trying to sleep. 1/2 hour later, I heard some noise from the child monitor so I went closer to the stairways and heard him opening the door of the toilet, and subsequent flushing followed by some rustling sound which I presume was him pulling up his nappy and pyjamas bottoms. Then he went straight to bed again! When I checked on him just then, he was sleeping soundly and even had himself tucked under the quilt!

Allow me to enjoy this special moment and bask in pride. If you are not a parent, this may not mean anything special to you. But for me, this is a very special milestone. My baby is growing up. And he is really developing into a mature and independent child. And may I remind you that he only turned 3 less than three months ago!

Toddlers are capable of pushing your buttons and can be very defiant. They also tend to develop fears out of nowhere - fear of monsters, fear of the dark, fear of being alone etc. So for what Aiden did yesterday and tonight, I am truly very proud of him. He is a good boy. And I just have to keep reminding myself not to expect too much from him all the time. Afterall, he is only 3.
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My handsome boys

Photo taken by a professional photographer at my husband's brother's beach wedding in Perth recently.

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My ever supportive admirer

I'm starting to get the feeling that my little 3 year old boy doesn't just love me. He is completely in love with me. He sees the need to tell me that he loves me a couple of times a day. It often begins with a hug, then he looks at me in the eyes with the most tender, loving expression and tells me I love you Mummy. Then he will finish off with a kiss. Isn't he just so deeply in love?

And that's not all. He also tells me that I'm pretty. Sometimes cute. It doesn't matter what I am wearing for the day. I can be dressed up and putting on makeup, or I may be sweating in the kitchen in my ratty home clothes making dinner. He will just come up to me out of the blue and tells me that I am pretty. And of course finish it off with his grand gestures of hugs, kisses and confessions of his love for me.

I don't know when he will grow out of this loving phase but I am trying to savour every moment. After all, I cannot imagine him doing these when he is 14 and will be too embarrassed to be even seen hugging his mother. But this morning, my husband and I were telling him about how his little girlfriend in Perth (yes he already has a girlfriend and is maintaining a long distance relationship) has been saying that she wants to marry him someday, he suddenly got all teary and upset. But I want to marry Mummy! I love Mummy! That was all he kept saying. And he wouldn't hear a word when his dad tried to explain to him.

Well, all I can say is, his future girlfriends indeed have got a lot to contend with.
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Photo taken in Febuary early this year when we were on our way to Nikko for skiing.
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Purposeful Play - Homemade Fun

I haven't done a purposeful play entry in a while. Here's something my husband did with Aiden sometime back.

Aiden pretending to be the driver of Thomas the tank engine and pulling along his 2 coaches, Annie and Clarabel that were made out of shoeboxes. I just realised that Annie and Clarabel appear to be really small in the picture here so you may not be able to see them clearly. It didn't cross my mind to take a closeup and well, I can't be bothered doing it now.

It all started when Aiden threw a tantrum (typical behaviour) at the shops when he wanted to purchase Annie and Clarabel and I refused to give in to his demands. I explained to him that he already has got too much toys at home and he wasn't even playing with most of them. Tears, whines and rolling stunts started and I just sat on a seat at the shop, waiting for him to finish his silly tantrums. And by the way, this happens preeetty often :). As you can imagine, I am fairly numb to the embarassmant in public. But I am not the type of parent to give in to silly demands of the child just because that is the easiest way out. And Aiden knows I mean what I say.

That night, I related the incident to my husband. Him, being the creative one of the both of us, suggested that we create Annie and Clarabel with stuff that we have already got at home. In this way, Aiden gets what he wants and at the same time learn about recycling things and how we can be creative. The little boy was of course very excited about the project that he and his dad were going to do. And in the end, my husband even made him the face of Thomas out of a cardboard and hung on his beck so that he could imagine himself to be the driver.












The proud moment.

My husband is great. I'm not a creative person and it didn't occur to me that we could have a project like this at home. It was cheap, fun and educational. The little boy was happy and learned something out of it. Win win!
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My little pain in the butt

My 3 year old boy is a morning person and often wakes up around 7am, occasionally earlier. But for some reason, his body clock seems to be wired in such a way that he only wakes up really early on weekends (when we want to sleep in) and on days that he has got no school.

The moment he wakes up, he will burst into energy and come running to our bedroom. Instead of waking us up directly, he will hover around us like an annoying fly and make a lot of noise like jumping around, or deliberately walk around with heavy footsteps. Or he will pretend to have difficulty putting on his underwear and talk to himself out loud. I mean really loud like even the neighbours can hear him. In short, he will do everything he can just so we can no longer sleep on, yet we cannot reprimand him coz well, he never actually told us to wake up did he? Irritating.

And guess what happens on the days he has school and has to up by 8am latest? Yes, he doesn't wake up and I often have to drag him out of bed by 8.30am when we are running late. How he manage to do this I will never know.

This is my annoying little shit.

What's for dinner?

The house is almost unpacked with just a few boxes lying around but I'm still trying to settle in my usual routine and playing catch up with chores and errands. I was looking at some photos that were taken before I went to Singapore and saw this which I have yet to post.

This is my "What's for dinner" post this week (for those who visit this blog frequently will know that I like to post an entry on what's for dinner once a week).

I'm pretty particular about Aiden's nuitrition and keep track of what he eats in a week as a general guideline. Above is one of Aiden's typical dinner - steamed fish fillet (seasoned with ginger, sesame oil and a dash of soy sauce), rice and a salad. He loves fish which is great as they are full of nutritional value and is especially good for brain development. I mentioned before that Aiden doesn't really like cooked vegetables so I iend to prepare a green salad as a side for him.

This is his way of showing appreciation for his dinner.












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Purposeful Play - A picnic with Barney and Spiderman

One boring afternoon, I decided to organize a picnic for Aiden and his best mates at our home as we were grounded by the doctor because he was sick. I gathered Barney, Baby Bop, Spiderman and a Kangaroo together for a cosy afternoon tea while Aiden prepared the "food" and all other cutlery.

Who would have known that Spiderman and Barney were actually good friends?

It was a pretend play session I arranged for Aiden and a great indoor game. There are many benefits to an imaginative play like this. Children learn by watching, imagining, copying and doing. An imaginative play stimulates the creativity in children and develop their thinking skills as they rack their brains while exploring the many options that they can have in a pretend play. By allowing them the opportunity to imagine themselves in different characters, it can also teach them about the moral skill of emphathy as they develop the ability to put themselves in the shoes of others. Most importantly, pretend play can greatly improve the language skills of young children as they make up interesting dialogues that can be used in the play. Try observing children when they are in the middle of some imaginative play session. Unless they are not interested, most children tend to be more chatty and involved during these times.

Unfortunately, Aiden wasn't really that interested in our picnic after asking Barney if he wanted tea for the third time. We packed up everything and he went off to get changed into something he was more keen on.

This.

I think he much prefer to be Spiderman than have him as the honorable guest at his picnic.

Whatever works.

My Secret Weapon

Most children doesn't like vegetables, but my almost 3 year old boy has a fairly weird vegetable preference. He doesn't enjoy cooked vegetables. He'll eat salads like raw radish, spinach leaves, lettuce, zucchinis happily. He even eats spring onions raw but he will never eat cooked carrot, broccoli, pumpkin etc. The only time I can get him to eat these vegetables is when I make them into a patty, or hide them in the fish cakes I make. Salads is a staple in almost every meal of his so I'm not too worried about his vegetable intake.

Apart from his weird vegetable preference, he also has a very "interesting" (and beyond comprehension to me) attitude towards fruit. He doesn't like them. The only fruit that he will eat occasionally are apples and bananas. And he hates fruit that are sweet. He even spat out sweet and juicy watermelon when I managed to get him to try some once.

I have tried many ways and means to increase his consumption of vegetables and fruit and I have finally found what I call, my secret weapon - Green Smoothie!

A green smoothie is basically a non-dairy, vegan smoothie made by blending green vegetables with fruit. The most commonly used vegetables in smoothies are spinach, kale, watercress and cabbage. As for fruit, I throw in bananas, avocado, pineapples, mangoes, oranges, berries etc. I mentioned in an earlier entry that my husband and I have been incorporating more raw meals into our daily diet and green smoothie is a power-packed snack that we try to have every other day. It has been established that drinking blended fruit and vegetables is even better than eating them as all their nutrients and fibre are broken down finely and hence much better absorbed by our bodies. Aiden loves his green smoothie so much that he will actually asked for them, emphasizing specifically that they have to be "green"!

Thumbs up for the green smoothie! He prefers this to sweet watermelon juice which he gags when he drinks them. Strange I know. My son is a weirdo.

Montessori Focus: Baking

 As part of our montessori activities at home, I do baking/cooking with Aiden fairly often. Cooking (or baking) falls under the "practical life activities" category of the montessori principle. It is believed that children benefit tremendously from being involved in the mundane household chores such as cleaning the tables, sweeping the floor, preparing food etc. Not only do such activities help to further develop their fine motor skills and coordination, they also instil a sense of responsibility in children at a very young age, so that they get used to contributing their part to the family.

I like to cook and bake so getting Aiden involved in the kitchen makes perfect sense to me. Afterall, which kid doesn't enjoy making a mess? My kitchen often ends up like a warzone after Aiden join me in food preparation. I don't enjoy that but that's part of life when you have a toddler. Mess can be cleaned up. The most important thing is Aiden really have a lot of fun whenever he is being allowed to join in the kitchen.

So we made some cookies the other day. Check out how focused he was when given a "job".

We brought some cookies to his school the next day and he happily shared them with his teachers and best mates.

Montessori Focus: The Prepared Environment

Today's post is on child education. For those who are not child-friendly people, I will strongly encourage you to stop reading so as not to be bored by my child talk! *oh dear, I'm sounding like such a boring housewife mother... tsk tsk*

I'm a big fan of the montessori way of educating children. Aiden goes to a montessori preschool in Japan and at home, we have also created a montessori environment where he is free (and safe) to explore and learn. In montessori, this is called "the prepared environment". For the benefit of those who are not familiar with the montessori philosophy, here are some pointers on the definition and features of a prepared environment.

Principle
The key concepts of Montessori are communicating respect for the individual child, the importance of freedom of movement to aid the child's physical and cognitive development, and allowing children to participate in daily routines of self care and care of the environment to assist learning and the development of independence. It is believed that children learn through their senses. And they learn by watching and re-applying their new found knowledge by moving around without inhibitions.

Safety
Attention must be paid to the safety of the environment. When there are no fears of danger, children are free to explore.

A place in every room
Have a corner in every room for the child's personal belongings (which explains why my son has got toys, books etc, everywhere in our house)

Others

• Shelves should be low so that the child knows how to get his toys and books, and where to pack them away when he is done.
• The child's bed should be low so that he can climb in and out of it without any help.
• A child -size table and chair in the main play area for the child to do art and craft work. This is to prepare them for future learning at school and to develop good posture that aid concentration.
• Have several stools in the house for the child to use to turn on the lights and wash their hands at the sinks. This is to foster independence.
• Place the child's utensils in low drawers so that he knows where to get them. Again, this foster independence.
• Have a place (wall or door) where the child can put up his drawing or artwork. This help to instil a sense of pride in them for their own achievements.
  

So anyway, our nightly routine involves getting Aiden to tidy up the living room by packing his toys away and putting them in the labelled drawers of his toy shelf (Montessori philosophy – assuming responsibility) before he goes to bed. But the other night, he was taking his own sweet time and after about 101 times of telling (sometimes yelling) him to put the toys away, we gave him an ultimatum –

“PACK UP YOUR TOYS NOW OR I WILL NOT READ YOU ANY BOOKS FOR BED!”

He got his act together immediately and this was what we got.



He was already out of sight by the time we noticed this mess that was transferred from the floor to the top of his shelves.

I guess we still have a looong way to go....

Beauty lies in the eyes of my son

Last weekend, my husband decided that we should go on a day trip to Chiba located in the greater Tokyo area. The place that we were visiting was famous for its stoned Buddha (reputed to be the largest in Japan) and a 100 feet tall Goddess of Mercy. The whole area was very hilly and involved a lot of walking and climbing of steps. My husband warned me about this and told me to wear my trek shoes for the day. We were rushing to leave so I quickly put on an airy blouse (summer now in Japan and freaking hot) and a pair of jeans.

We were in the elevator when it dawned on me that my trek shoes did not match my outfit for the day. In fact, I would even say I looked like a fashion disaster (which explains why there are no photos for this post). I started grumbling to my husband about how horrible I looked when I felt my boy's hand touching mine. He was looking up at me and in a very soft and sweet voice, he said:

"Mummy, you look pretty."

Awwww.... how sweet is that?

My wake-up call

This is how I woke up this morning.

Scene: My bedroom

Me : zzzzzzz..........

Aiden : "I CANNOT BELIEVE IT!"

I startled and jumped out of bed.

Me : "WHAT??!!"

Aiden : "I cannot believe it! Daddy's work clothes are on the floor!!"

The fresh laundry were on the floor as I haven't had the time to fold and put them away.

Aiden : "Daddy needs to wear this to work! His boss will be angry! Because the shirt is dirty! Daddy will be put on TIME-OUT!"

I dropped my head and went back to bed.

Me: "It's not a big deal Aiden. There is more in life to worry about."

Aiden: "NOOOOO!!"

Then he went on and on about how we had to pick the shirt up and wash it again. How his Daddy will be in trouble. And how angry his boss will be. Until......

I finally dragged myself out of bed to pick the shirt up. And convinced him that his Daddy will NOT be put on time-out.

By then, I was fully awake.

This is my beautiful life.

My little Fashionista

From the time he was about 18 months old, Aiden started (out of nowhere) to develop a keen interest in fashion. I know that toddlers tend to want control and independence at some stage of their growth and they usually begin with choosing their own outfits. But from what I have read, this normally happen when they are about 2 or 3 years of age. Wanting a say in the choice of clothing at the age of 18 months is definitely waayyyy too early so you can imagine how much Aiden has been driving me crazy for the past 16 months.

Every morning, Aiden wants to get changed into his day clothes as soon as he gets out of bed. And I mean literally as soon as. He pulls out his drawer and start talking to himself, deliberating on what to wear for the day. It is now summer in Japan and the weather has been progressingly hot and humid. But he ONLY wants to wear long trousers (god knows why). In fact, he only wants to wear this particular pair of jeans because, according to him, it is long and blue. At the moment, he is into the prints of skulls and ninjas so he will only wear t-shirts with these designs on. And previously for a long period of time, Aiden's favourite colour was yellow and he wanted to wear his one and only yellow t-shirt everywhere he went. He got really upset whenever that t-shirt had to be washed. Oh, and he always matched the t-shirt with his yellow shoes coz, well, they matched.

I have wasted quite a fair bit of money on clothes and shoes that ended at the bottom of his closet and never seeing daylight just because he did not approve of them. And frankly, I can still put up with all these until recently, when he started to poke his nose into MY DRESSING too! I'm serious! Lately, I haven't been able to leave the house unless he agrees with what I wear. In fact, he makes his wishes clear to me before I even get the chance to go through my wardrobe. He will tell me that I should wear a dress for the day. Or that I should also wear a red t-shirt because he was wearing one too. If I dare go against his wishes, a huge tantrum (that includes tears and rolling around on the floor) will happen over the next 10 minutes. Somedays I just have to do as he says if we are in a rush and I do not have the time to argue with him. It is easier that way.

The other day, his interference in my dressing got to a new high point. We were getting ready to go to the park and he was already prepared with his shoes on and waiting for me at the door. As I was walking towards the door, I noticed that he was carrying a pair of shoes in his arms. My strappy, shiny, gold stilettos! I was in t-shirt and shorts by the way.

"Mummy, you should wear these today. They are pretty."

Can someone please kill me?

Pride of a Mother

Last week, I was invited to a private session with the Head of School that Aiden has been attending. This is a yearly Parent-Teacher Conference where they reviewed Aiden's progress at school and his general behaviour away from home.

I have to say the session went really well and I learnt a lot more about my son from an outsider's point of view. Aiden will be turning 3 this August and he definitely is still in the terrible-twos phase. The past few weeks have been exceptionally challenging and stressful for me as he become increasingly defiant, rude, and throws tantrums on, say. an hourly basis (regardless of where he is. We could be at the supermarket, or in the car, at the park etc. He would snap and turn into full tantrum mode if there is anything that pisses him off). The principal touched on the topic of defiant behaviour too, as she related some of the cheeky stuff he had been up to in the classroom. We both agreed (and hoped) that it should only be a phase.

The Principal (whom I will call as Ms J) also complimented Aiden for being one of the most articulate child in the class despite being one of the younger ones. For those who are not aware, this is a Montessori pre-school where children are divided into 2 age groups - 1.5 yr old to 4, and 4 to 6 yr old. Aiden belong to the younger class of course. Ms J said that she finds Aiden very intelligent for his age. She recalled that the first time we brought Aiden for orientation, he was already able to recite all 26 alphabets and what most of them stand for. And he was only 22 month old at that time. Ms J also said that Aiden is very studious as he seems to enjoy reading, tracing letters, numbers and memory games. She even praised him for being able to accomplish tasks that even some of the 4 year olds at the school could not accomplished. At the end of the session, Ms J also suggested that perhaps by early next year, Aiden should move up to the higher class as they focus more on the academic learning which he seems to be interested in and she is confident that he is up for the challenge.

I have to say I am a very proud mum. I know that Aiden is a pretty smart boy but it is always nice to hear that from an outsider. People may say that Ms J might have been just trying to flatter, or that she says the same things to every parent but seriously, I know what my son is capable of. Aiden understood the concept of counting when he was merely 20 month old. I discovered that when playing some random wooden blocks with him. I have the habit of asking him difficult questions not expecting him to give me the correct answers but he has surprised (and impressed me) from time to time. I remember putting 4 blocks infront of him and he said "4" to me. And when I took 2 blocks away, he still gave me a correct answer. When he was just over a year old, he started playing with jigsaw puzzles. Now, he is able to complete a 150 piece world map puzzle (not an easy one) in approximately 25 minutes if he is not distracted. He is also extremely observant and aware of the surroundings. We have the habit of discussing his day at school when he comes home and he will always tell me individually what all his friends brought for lunch, what colour shirts they wore etc. His attention to details and ability to recall and relate events is amazing for a toddler who is not even 3. Oh, and he can even spell a simple word like "cat".

I know I sound like I am boasting here but I am sure any mothers out there can relate to this kind of pride that only parents have for their children. One of the reasons that I set this blog up is so that I have a space where I can document the various milestones of my child's development. I will grow old one day. And memory may fail me. But this is a place where I can always look back on how proud my son has once made me. This may even come in handy when I have to make a speech at his wedding one day!

This is my little man.



Going to school on a cold winter morning.

My son's playful tummy

After a lazy morning at home today, I decided to take my boy to his favourite indoor play area (Jackmall) in town and drain off some of his excessive energy. We left home just before noon and since we had a late breakfast, I wasn't sure if he was hungry enough to have lunch before going to Jackmall, or if I should let him play and then have a late lunch. As we were driving into town, we had the following conversation.

Me : aiden, are you hungry enough to eat?

Aiden : no, mummy.

Me : are you sure? maybe we should ask your tummy. Does your tummy want food?

Aiden : no. my tummy wants to play.

Me : ................ wow, you have a clever tummy (I was at a loss for words actually)

Aiden : yes mummy. So can we go to Jackmall now??