The past couple of months have been hectic. The earthquake on 11 March in Japan resulted in us moving to Singapore, my hometown, for a month. We made the decision to relocate back to Perth, Western Australia (where my husband is from) so on 19 April, I went back to Japan with my son with just 5 days to do final packing and bid farewell. We arrived in Perth on 24 April.
Things did not get easier after we came back. We had been away for 4 years and almost everything from medical accounts, driver's licence to bank accounts needed to be re-established again. We also had to find an obstetrician who could squeeze me in for my september delivery and a new school for our 3.5 year old. On top of all these, we also had to decide on a new car, and a house to rent which took us almost 4 weeks. We finally moved into a nice rented house on 26 May and things are starting to settle down a little for us.
I don't want to go into the fine details of everything that had happened over the past few months. It had been extremely hectic, and was probably the most stressful time of my life. I have been trying my very best to deal with it and although things are finally settling down into a routine again, I am still trying to recover from the impact of everything that had happened. I am mentally and physically very exhausted. Been thinking alot about life lately and I know I still have certain issues to deal with. For this reason, I will stop writing on this blog for the time being. I need to give myself some space to seek clarity in life again. So it's adieus for now while I go into hibernation.
x
x
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Feeling blessed
Life is like a rainbow. You need both the sun and the rain to make its colours appear - anonymous.
Very true indeed. It was rain for me yesterday. I had pregnancy gastric and backache at the same time. I had to manage Aiden the whole day as he had no school. I covered my mouth to prevent myself from throwing up as I cooked dinner. I cried to my husband. I felt miserable.
Today I saw a little ray of sunshine. Aiden was picked up for school by a friend. I had a peaceful 3 hour nap in the morning. I walked to his school to pick him up in the afternoon. The fresh air and sunshine felt good. The pain from yesterday was not present. I felt hope.
These days, my life is full of ups and downs. Some days I feel ok, with no gastric, backache or shortness of breath. But some days are gloomier. The gastric pain and backaches make me just want to do nothing but lie in bed or on the couch. Some days I feel good enough to take Aiden out for a walk or to the playground. Some days he just has to entertain himself with toys and tv while I lie down to rest.
I'm starting to learn to work with my body. I realised that I usually feel the best the hour after I have breakfast so that means that is the best time for me to engage in activities like laundry or household chores. By afternoon my body deteriorates so that means it is time to rest. I still don't have the appetitite but can at least consume some food as compared to a couple of weeks ago. But my gastric problem makes me feel terribly bloated after a meal (even when I eat very little) so I've learnt to eat my food really slowly. And I mean really, really slowly.
I'm feeling really thankful for the support I have been receiving after my world came crashing down (okay I'm joking but you know what I mean) since I found out that I'm pregnant. I've been talking to my mum everyday, sometimes crying to her because I was in pain. She not only listens, but tells me that she completely understands what i am going thru and that I can always cry to her. Some of my good old friends in Singapore have sent me words of encouragement over emails or facebook and I am more than thankful for the fact that they are thinking of me. A couple of friends that I have made here have also been wonderful, offering help with Aiden, taking him to school and picking him up when they can. Like the other morning when it rained, I had 3 friends who called just to ask if they could help pick Aiden up for school. And of course there is also my husband who may not necessarily understand what I am going thru but is nevertheless very supportive and helps out at home whenever he can.
My life is beautiful because of these people. And for that, I feel very blessed.
x
Very true indeed. It was rain for me yesterday. I had pregnancy gastric and backache at the same time. I had to manage Aiden the whole day as he had no school. I covered my mouth to prevent myself from throwing up as I cooked dinner. I cried to my husband. I felt miserable.
Today I saw a little ray of sunshine. Aiden was picked up for school by a friend. I had a peaceful 3 hour nap in the morning. I walked to his school to pick him up in the afternoon. The fresh air and sunshine felt good. The pain from yesterday was not present. I felt hope.
These days, my life is full of ups and downs. Some days I feel ok, with no gastric, backache or shortness of breath. But some days are gloomier. The gastric pain and backaches make me just want to do nothing but lie in bed or on the couch. Some days I feel good enough to take Aiden out for a walk or to the playground. Some days he just has to entertain himself with toys and tv while I lie down to rest.
I'm starting to learn to work with my body. I realised that I usually feel the best the hour after I have breakfast so that means that is the best time for me to engage in activities like laundry or household chores. By afternoon my body deteriorates so that means it is time to rest. I still don't have the appetitite but can at least consume some food as compared to a couple of weeks ago. But my gastric problem makes me feel terribly bloated after a meal (even when I eat very little) so I've learnt to eat my food really slowly. And I mean really, really slowly.
I'm feeling really thankful for the support I have been receiving after my world came crashing down (okay I'm joking but you know what I mean) since I found out that I'm pregnant. I've been talking to my mum everyday, sometimes crying to her because I was in pain. She not only listens, but tells me that she completely understands what i am going thru and that I can always cry to her. Some of my good old friends in Singapore have sent me words of encouragement over emails or facebook and I am more than thankful for the fact that they are thinking of me. A couple of friends that I have made here have also been wonderful, offering help with Aiden, taking him to school and picking him up when they can. Like the other morning when it rained, I had 3 friends who called just to ask if they could help pick Aiden up for school. And of course there is also my husband who may not necessarily understand what I am going thru but is nevertheless very supportive and helps out at home whenever he can.
My life is beautiful because of these people. And for that, I feel very blessed.
x
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Armless Pianist Liu Wei - You're Beautiful (Winner of China's Got Talent...
I just have to share this. The story of a 22 year old guy in China who lost both his arms due to a tragic accident at the age of 10. He had to learn to rely on his legs, feet and toes for everything in life and picked up piano at the age of 19. This is his finale performance at China's Got Talent reality show where he won last year. A very moving performance that revealed a truly inspiring story. Susan Boyle, please step aside.
Count our blessings shall we?
x
Friday, December 17, 2010
In life, some rain must fall
I cannot believe X'mas is only a week away. The past 2 months have been very busy for me and I feel that 7 days is not gonna be enough for me to get everything done before Santa knocks on the door. Wish there is a way I can buy time.
I spent almost 4 hours with the japanese police yesterday afternoon, an experience I wish I didn't have to go thru. It was about the accident where my car collided with a motorbike at an intersection in my residential area 2 weeks ago. After the accident happened, the police had me described the entire incident and told me they would contact me again for a formal statement. And that was why I had an appointment with them yesterday in the afternoon. Although I kinda knew what to expect, I couldn't help but ended up feeling frustrated (with them) and downright pissed off. They told me that they were not taking sides, yet they insisted that they did not believe that the biker were going beyond the speed limit when he crashed into my car. It frustrated me that they jumped into the conclusion when they were not even there to witness the accident. The photos that they took at the scene showed very clearly that my entire car was already in the middle of the junction when the collision happened and until today, I still cannot figure how the biker could have not seen me! But the police insisted that it was my fault because I had not checked my right which wasn't true. I had already stopped at the stop line (before it all happened) and that was to check on the opposite mirror for vehicles coming from the right. And because the road was designed in such a way that there were many blindspots, I had to also check my left (apart from checking right) since I was crossing over to the left lane as I turned. I couldn't believe when they actually told me that I didn't have to check the left! And let any car crash into me as I turn into that lane? I wonder.
I knew dealing with the japanese would be hard but still, I was angry as they didn't seem to be taking in anything that I said. Even my japanese friend who accompanied me yesterday (and also acted as the translator) was on the verge of quarreling with them. The last straw was, they tried to make me sign a statement that indicated clearly "I caused the accident because...." and "I could have avoided the accident if I had...." . Doesn't that sound like I am saying that I should be held full responsibility for it? I'm not saying that I have no part to play but it was an accident and I believe I wasn't the only party involved in that. Fortunately, my friend managed to make them change the statement as she insisted that it was simply too unfair to me. Just when I thought this whole episode will be over, they told me that they were charging me with causing unintentional injury to the other party. Never mind the fact that there was a very hugh possibility that he was speeding. And that he was negligent or daydreaming to the extent that he could not see my big silver car a good distance infront of him. His crash tore off my number plate and damaged my bumper which had to be replaced. If he had not been speeding, the impact would not have been that great
When I finally got home last night, the exhaustion hit me and it was only then I realised how mentally drained I was. It will be 3 to 6 months before I receive the summon to see the proscecutor who will decide how much fine I will have to pay (and it really appears to me that they are trying to make money out of this). I am not worried as there's nothing I can do except to wait. The feeling sucks especially when I have never even gotten a parking fine in my 10 years of driving in Singapore and Australia.
Amidst all the frustration and stress, I am just so thankful that I have the help and care from people around me. My friend who stayed with me for the 4 hours yesterday and helped with the translation, standing up for me to the local police when I cannot speak the language. She and another friend also helped ferrying Aiden to school (without me asking) during the 2 weeks that my car was in the workshop having the bumper replaced. And most importantly, my husband who has not once blamed me for the accident but been giving tremendous emotional support and shouldering the stressful tasks of dealing with the insurance side and the car workshop so that I need not worry about the nitty gritty stuff.
For now, I just wanna put this behind. Well, at least until I receive the summon letter. It's gonna be X'mas and I'm determined to enjoy it.
I spent almost 4 hours with the japanese police yesterday afternoon, an experience I wish I didn't have to go thru. It was about the accident where my car collided with a motorbike at an intersection in my residential area 2 weeks ago. After the accident happened, the police had me described the entire incident and told me they would contact me again for a formal statement. And that was why I had an appointment with them yesterday in the afternoon. Although I kinda knew what to expect, I couldn't help but ended up feeling frustrated (with them) and downright pissed off. They told me that they were not taking sides, yet they insisted that they did not believe that the biker were going beyond the speed limit when he crashed into my car. It frustrated me that they jumped into the conclusion when they were not even there to witness the accident. The photos that they took at the scene showed very clearly that my entire car was already in the middle of the junction when the collision happened and until today, I still cannot figure how the biker could have not seen me! But the police insisted that it was my fault because I had not checked my right which wasn't true. I had already stopped at the stop line (before it all happened) and that was to check on the opposite mirror for vehicles coming from the right. And because the road was designed in such a way that there were many blindspots, I had to also check my left (apart from checking right) since I was crossing over to the left lane as I turned. I couldn't believe when they actually told me that I didn't have to check the left! And let any car crash into me as I turn into that lane? I wonder.
I knew dealing with the japanese would be hard but still, I was angry as they didn't seem to be taking in anything that I said. Even my japanese friend who accompanied me yesterday (and also acted as the translator) was on the verge of quarreling with them. The last straw was, they tried to make me sign a statement that indicated clearly "I caused the accident because...." and "I could have avoided the accident if I had...." . Doesn't that sound like I am saying that I should be held full responsibility for it? I'm not saying that I have no part to play but it was an accident and I believe I wasn't the only party involved in that. Fortunately, my friend managed to make them change the statement as she insisted that it was simply too unfair to me. Just when I thought this whole episode will be over, they told me that they were charging me with causing unintentional injury to the other party. Never mind the fact that there was a very hugh possibility that he was speeding. And that he was negligent or daydreaming to the extent that he could not see my big silver car a good distance infront of him. His crash tore off my number plate and damaged my bumper which had to be replaced. If he had not been speeding, the impact would not have been that great
When I finally got home last night, the exhaustion hit me and it was only then I realised how mentally drained I was. It will be 3 to 6 months before I receive the summon to see the proscecutor who will decide how much fine I will have to pay (and it really appears to me that they are trying to make money out of this). I am not worried as there's nothing I can do except to wait. The feeling sucks especially when I have never even gotten a parking fine in my 10 years of driving in Singapore and Australia.
Amidst all the frustration and stress, I am just so thankful that I have the help and care from people around me. My friend who stayed with me for the 4 hours yesterday and helped with the translation, standing up for me to the local police when I cannot speak the language. She and another friend also helped ferrying Aiden to school (without me asking) during the 2 weeks that my car was in the workshop having the bumper replaced. And most importantly, my husband who has not once blamed me for the accident but been giving tremendous emotional support and shouldering the stressful tasks of dealing with the insurance side and the car workshop so that I need not worry about the nitty gritty stuff.
For now, I just wanna put this behind. Well, at least until I receive the summon letter. It's gonna be X'mas and I'm determined to enjoy it.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
The powerful mind
I was thinking about depression this morning. Not that I'm depressed or what, although I do know a few people who are dealing with different levels of depression personally.
A friend posted this as her status on facebook recently: depression is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign that you have been trying to be strong for too long. Do you agree with this? I used to think that depression will only hit the weak-minded people but now I'm not so sure anymore. Especially after going thru Aiden's first year where he totally brought out the most vulnerable side of me and threw me off my line. I was the last person I thought would ever get depressed. Even my mum used to joke about how I would only make people around me depressed (thanks mum). Now, I am convinced that depression can hit anybody and there can be many reasons why it happens. But even though it may not be a sign of weakness, I don't believe it happens just because you have been trying to be too strong either.
I used to follow a very popular blog that documents her daily life as a mother of 3. Her blog is very inviting and full of positive energy. At one point, it even made me wonder if it was really true that her life is only flooded with sunshine and rainbows. I stopped reading not because I was jealous or being a sour grape. I just felt that everything she wrote appeared to be too try hard, staged, and well, simply unreal. But recently, I went into her site just to check (and I had nothing else to read on the internet) and read a post where she came clean about how she actually has been suffering from depression (varying degrees at different times) for the past 5 years! Was I surprised? Not really. but I do give her credit for confessing. What I am now wondering is, all the great, beautiful, positive stuff that she has been writing about on her blog, are they written as a cover for the negative feelings she has inside her? Is she doing this as a form of self-therapy? Did she feel the need to write about only the good stuff so that she could remind herself that life is beautiful?
Don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to determine if she is right or wrong. There isn't even one in the first place. Everyone deals with their problems differently. But what I do know is, our mind is a very powerful tool. Whenever I feel down, I go in search of the resilient heart inside me. When I find it, I calm down to re-focus. I follow a path and seek my way out. If you are in some kind of depression, you lose your way. That was what happened to me in that first year of motherhood. I was lost for the very first time in my life. When you are lost, you fear. When you fear, you frantic. When you frantic, you start to spin. And that is when all negative emotions set in. If you keep holding on to the bad feelings and unpleasant experiences, you will never get out of the maze. In the more serious cases, people sink.
Yesterday, I was reading a blog that I came across recently. She is an american with 2 young children, of which one is suffering from down syndrome. She only found out about this when the child was born. It was of course devastating but it seems like she came to terms very quickly. She accepted the fact and now writes this blog where she focuses about enjoying the small things in life. She did admit the fact that she sometimes cries when things happen, she uses her mind to overcome it. In her own words, she wrote "Every time I begin to sink, I remind myself that I am a rockstar. And rockstars know that life is beautiful. Life has challenges. Life teaches you things. And life is all how you look at it."
Will she ever breakdown one day? Has she really accepted and come to terms with the unfortunate situation? Not denying is one thing, but totally accepting and feeling okay about it is another. Is she saying the above becasue she needs to hear it herself? That she has to constantly remind herself that this is how she should look at life. She is not a friend but I do wish her all the best.
I don't what had called for this post. Perhaps it was because I had an accident where my car collided with a bike this morning and felt shitty about it. I'm physically ok but the man on the bike had to be sent to the hospital. Not unconscious or anything. He was hurt on the arm and leg and so couldn't walk. So after I came home, I felt so lousy about the whole incident. I didn't like the fact that this had happened after I have been driving with no bad records for more than 10 years in Singapore and Australia. I wondered if the man is fine. I kept replaying the whole accident in my brain and tried to find an answer to whether or not I was entirely at fault. I kept wondering if I could have been more careful.
And all of a sudden, something reminded me to search for that heart again. The mind is indeed a very powerful thing. I calmed down and let go. Let go of the thoughts and let go for the negative feelings. My heart is no longer heavy and my mind is clearing up. Re-focus. That's what we always have to do in life. Imperfections are what make life beautiful. And most importantly, learn to love yourself.
x
x
A friend posted this as her status on facebook recently: depression is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign that you have been trying to be strong for too long. Do you agree with this? I used to think that depression will only hit the weak-minded people but now I'm not so sure anymore. Especially after going thru Aiden's first year where he totally brought out the most vulnerable side of me and threw me off my line. I was the last person I thought would ever get depressed. Even my mum used to joke about how I would only make people around me depressed (thanks mum). Now, I am convinced that depression can hit anybody and there can be many reasons why it happens. But even though it may not be a sign of weakness, I don't believe it happens just because you have been trying to be too strong either.
I used to follow a very popular blog that documents her daily life as a mother of 3. Her blog is very inviting and full of positive energy. At one point, it even made me wonder if it was really true that her life is only flooded with sunshine and rainbows. I stopped reading not because I was jealous or being a sour grape. I just felt that everything she wrote appeared to be too try hard, staged, and well, simply unreal. But recently, I went into her site just to check (and I had nothing else to read on the internet) and read a post where she came clean about how she actually has been suffering from depression (varying degrees at different times) for the past 5 years! Was I surprised? Not really. but I do give her credit for confessing. What I am now wondering is, all the great, beautiful, positive stuff that she has been writing about on her blog, are they written as a cover for the negative feelings she has inside her? Is she doing this as a form of self-therapy? Did she feel the need to write about only the good stuff so that she could remind herself that life is beautiful?
Don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to determine if she is right or wrong. There isn't even one in the first place. Everyone deals with their problems differently. But what I do know is, our mind is a very powerful tool. Whenever I feel down, I go in search of the resilient heart inside me. When I find it, I calm down to re-focus. I follow a path and seek my way out. If you are in some kind of depression, you lose your way. That was what happened to me in that first year of motherhood. I was lost for the very first time in my life. When you are lost, you fear. When you fear, you frantic. When you frantic, you start to spin. And that is when all negative emotions set in. If you keep holding on to the bad feelings and unpleasant experiences, you will never get out of the maze. In the more serious cases, people sink.
Yesterday, I was reading a blog that I came across recently. She is an american with 2 young children, of which one is suffering from down syndrome. She only found out about this when the child was born. It was of course devastating but it seems like she came to terms very quickly. She accepted the fact and now writes this blog where she focuses about enjoying the small things in life. She did admit the fact that she sometimes cries when things happen, she uses her mind to overcome it. In her own words, she wrote "Every time I begin to sink, I remind myself that I am a rockstar. And rockstars know that life is beautiful. Life has challenges. Life teaches you things. And life is all how you look at it."
Will she ever breakdown one day? Has she really accepted and come to terms with the unfortunate situation? Not denying is one thing, but totally accepting and feeling okay about it is another. Is she saying the above becasue she needs to hear it herself? That she has to constantly remind herself that this is how she should look at life. She is not a friend but I do wish her all the best.
I don't what had called for this post. Perhaps it was because I had an accident where my car collided with a bike this morning and felt shitty about it. I'm physically ok but the man on the bike had to be sent to the hospital. Not unconscious or anything. He was hurt on the arm and leg and so couldn't walk. So after I came home, I felt so lousy about the whole incident. I didn't like the fact that this had happened after I have been driving with no bad records for more than 10 years in Singapore and Australia. I wondered if the man is fine. I kept replaying the whole accident in my brain and tried to find an answer to whether or not I was entirely at fault. I kept wondering if I could have been more careful.
And all of a sudden, something reminded me to search for that heart again. The mind is indeed a very powerful thing. I calmed down and let go. Let go of the thoughts and let go for the negative feelings. My heart is no longer heavy and my mind is clearing up. Re-focus. That's what we always have to do in life. Imperfections are what make life beautiful. And most importantly, learn to love yourself.
x
x
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Hyperactive?
I'm talking about me, not my 3 year old!
Yeah.... I suspect I'm suffering from hyperactivity. I can't sit still, I have to keep doing things, and I multi-task really well. I haven't been sleeping alot lately, not that I have slept much in the past anyway. I just happen to be a person who doesn't need alot of sleep to function. Bedtime is usually around 1am and I'm often up around 7.30am as Aiden goes to school several days a week. And when I'm up and running, my days here are often packed with errands, activities, appointments with people and god knows what. Today is one example of a busy busy day in my life here in Japan.
7.45 - 9am
Woke up. Made breakfast for Aiden and prepared his bento (rice, potato fish cakes and salad) for school. Washed dishes and cleaned the kitchen. Got both of us dressed for the day.
9am - 12pm
Dropped the boy at school. Sent clothes to the drycleaners. Went to the local shops. Bought some x'mas giftsfriends, grocery for the next few days and flowers for the grandparents who were arriving back today from Hiroshima.
12pm - 1.45pm
Arrived home. Set up the flowers. Did laundry. Had lunch. Made the crust for a fruit tart that I was planning to bake (I had planned to finish making the tart before leaving the house again but didn't have enough time to do everything).
2pm - 4.15pm
Picked the boy up from school. Hanged out at a friend's place while the kids played.
4.30pm - 5.30pm
Arrived home. Aiden went down for a nap. I continued making my berry tart (crust was cooled and ready by then).
5.30pm - 6.30pm
Started cooking Julia Child's recipe for Boeuf Bourguignon (my first attempt!). It was meant to be for dinner tomorrow night but this dish needs about 4 hours cooking time so I thought I better start today and finish up tomorrow. It was alot of work.
6.30pm - 7pm
Boeuf Bourguignon was cooking in the oven. I cleaned up the kitchen - wiped the stove top, mopped the floor, wash and dried the dishes, checked that my berry tart was setting well in the fridge. Aiden had woken up in the meantime. Let him watch some tv while I went upstairs to tidy up the bathroom and vacuumed the floors.
7pm - 7.30pm
Made dinner (simple dish of pasta) for Aiden and myself. Sat down to eat and talked about the day.
7.30pm - 8pm
Washed the dishes and cleaned up the kitchen again. Vacuumed the floors in living and dining room. Gave Aiden some yoghurt for dessert.
8pm - 10 pm
Decorate our fireplace with x'mas ornaments. Husband arrived home with the grandparents. Caught up with them. Took Boeuf Buorguignon out of the oven.
10pm
Took Aiden to bed. Read him 2 books.
10.30pm onwards
Ate a slice of the berry tart. Took photos (for my next blog post, hehe). Go online (catch up on international news, emails, facebook, update blog, research for our trip to Hiroshima, Osaka in december and Hokkaido in february next year, catch up on my regular blog reads etc).
See what I mean? After a long busy day (most of which I brought it upon myself I know. I didn't have to bake a berry tart and cook a boeuf bourguignon on the same day), I am amazed that I am still bursting with energy. Life has been busy but good. I actually really like it this way. I guess I just enjoy stretching myself like that. A little crazy I know. Perhaps I am really suffering from hyperactivity disorder. Am I too old to get a professional diagnosis??
Oh, and amidst my hectic schedule, I managed to find time to shop. For myself. I picked up a new Longchamp yesterday! See, I always allocate time for shopping. No matter how busy I may be. Muahahaha!!!
x
x
Yeah.... I suspect I'm suffering from hyperactivity. I can't sit still, I have to keep doing things, and I multi-task really well. I haven't been sleeping alot lately, not that I have slept much in the past anyway. I just happen to be a person who doesn't need alot of sleep to function. Bedtime is usually around 1am and I'm often up around 7.30am as Aiden goes to school several days a week. And when I'm up and running, my days here are often packed with errands, activities, appointments with people and god knows what. Today is one example of a busy busy day in my life here in Japan.
7.45 - 9am
Woke up. Made breakfast for Aiden and prepared his bento (rice, potato fish cakes and salad) for school. Washed dishes and cleaned the kitchen. Got both of us dressed for the day.
9am - 12pm
Dropped the boy at school. Sent clothes to the drycleaners. Went to the local shops. Bought some x'mas giftsfriends, grocery for the next few days and flowers for the grandparents who were arriving back today from Hiroshima.
12pm - 1.45pm
Arrived home. Set up the flowers. Did laundry. Had lunch. Made the crust for a fruit tart that I was planning to bake (I had planned to finish making the tart before leaving the house again but didn't have enough time to do everything).
2pm - 4.15pm
Picked the boy up from school. Hanged out at a friend's place while the kids played.
4.30pm - 5.30pm
Arrived home. Aiden went down for a nap. I continued making my berry tart (crust was cooled and ready by then).
5.30pm - 6.30pm
Started cooking Julia Child's recipe for Boeuf Bourguignon (my first attempt!). It was meant to be for dinner tomorrow night but this dish needs about 4 hours cooking time so I thought I better start today and finish up tomorrow. It was alot of work.
6.30pm - 7pm
Boeuf Bourguignon was cooking in the oven. I cleaned up the kitchen - wiped the stove top, mopped the floor, wash and dried the dishes, checked that my berry tart was setting well in the fridge. Aiden had woken up in the meantime. Let him watch some tv while I went upstairs to tidy up the bathroom and vacuumed the floors.
7pm - 7.30pm
Made dinner (simple dish of pasta) for Aiden and myself. Sat down to eat and talked about the day.
7.30pm - 8pm
Washed the dishes and cleaned up the kitchen again. Vacuumed the floors in living and dining room. Gave Aiden some yoghurt for dessert.
8pm - 10 pm
Decorate our fireplace with x'mas ornaments. Husband arrived home with the grandparents. Caught up with them. Took Boeuf Buorguignon out of the oven.
10pm
Took Aiden to bed. Read him 2 books.
10.30pm onwards
Ate a slice of the berry tart. Took photos (for my next blog post, hehe). Go online (catch up on international news, emails, facebook, update blog, research for our trip to Hiroshima, Osaka in december and Hokkaido in february next year, catch up on my regular blog reads etc).
See what I mean? After a long busy day (most of which I brought it upon myself I know. I didn't have to bake a berry tart and cook a boeuf bourguignon on the same day), I am amazed that I am still bursting with energy. Life has been busy but good. I actually really like it this way. I guess I just enjoy stretching myself like that. A little crazy I know. Perhaps I am really suffering from hyperactivity disorder. Am I too old to get a professional diagnosis??
Oh, and amidst my hectic schedule, I managed to find time to shop. For myself. I picked up a new Longchamp yesterday! See, I always allocate time for shopping. No matter how busy I may be. Muahahaha!!!
x
x
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
A new title!
Has anyone noticed that the title of this blog has been changed?
Yes, my blog is no longer known as "Simple Pleasures, Beautiful Life". The web address remains unchanged of course but for the benefit of my friends who are not very tech-savvy, I'm telling you now that you don't have to do anything if this site has already been bookmarked and saved in your favourites.
When I first started this blog, I wanted to write about things that I am passionate about. I enjoy life, and I wanted this page to have a strong force of positive energy. I try to steer away from negative content but I don't believe that life is just about unicorns, sunshine and rainbows. I want to keep this real and this means I will occasionally ramble about stuff that have angered the bull in me (well, I'm a taurean). This blog is meant to be a journal where I mostly document everything that interest me and that includes my love for cooking, music, good old movies, parenting and early childhood education (which explains the posts on montessori and purposeful play). As for the negative stuff that may occasionally come up on this site, well, I call them the little imperfections in life and I promise to do so with a sense of humour.
There you have it. Welcome to my beautiful journey where life is all about simple pleasures and little imperfections!
I hope to continue writing. So I hope you will continue reading.
Oh, has anyone also noticed that I have changed the description in "About Me" on the right of this page??
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Yes, my blog is no longer known as "Simple Pleasures, Beautiful Life". The web address remains unchanged of course but for the benefit of my friends who are not very tech-savvy, I'm telling you now that you don't have to do anything if this site has already been bookmarked and saved in your favourites.
When I first started this blog, I wanted to write about things that I am passionate about. I enjoy life, and I wanted this page to have a strong force of positive energy. I try to steer away from negative content but I don't believe that life is just about unicorns, sunshine and rainbows. I want to keep this real and this means I will occasionally ramble about stuff that have angered the bull in me (well, I'm a taurean). This blog is meant to be a journal where I mostly document everything that interest me and that includes my love for cooking, music, good old movies, parenting and early childhood education (which explains the posts on montessori and purposeful play). As for the negative stuff that may occasionally come up on this site, well, I call them the little imperfections in life and I promise to do so with a sense of humour.
There you have it. Welcome to my beautiful journey where life is all about simple pleasures and little imperfections!
I hope to continue writing. So I hope you will continue reading.
Oh, has anyone also noticed that I have changed the description in "About Me" on the right of this page??
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x
Friday, October 22, 2010
Boy, Girl, or Other?
I came across an interesting article in a magazine I picked up in Australia recently. It was titled "Why I won't reveal if my child is a boy or a girl" and was an interview of a 31 year old single mother who has been keeping the gender of her 1.5 year old toddler unknown. Except for herself, the child's biological dad, her own mother and a few friends who help to babysit occasionally, nobody knows if the child is a boy or a girl. Interesting?
According to this woman, she wants the child to grow up unhibited by the social expectations of the gender. She does not want him/her to be defined that way and she believes that this is liberating. To practise this non-gender way of parenting, she allows the child to have access to all kinds of toys from barbie dolls to trucks and trains. She also dresses the child up in a dress one day and shirt/trousers in another day. Even when she has to open up a bank account for the child, she hand-draw another box and write "other" instead of ticking "boy" or "girl".
While I can understand the reasoning behind her unorthodox way of parenting, I cannot bring myself to agree with her. Personally, I believe that it is important for a child to grow up with a strong sense of self. An identity to be exact. We cannot change the fact that a child is a boy if he is born that way, and it is necessary that he knows that too. In addition to that, the physical differences between a boy and a girl. I do agree that children should have full access to a wide range of toys but to dress a boy in a girly, frilly dress is, well, just wrong. My 3 year old has a good number of soft toys and he plays with a kid size kitchen. He likes to help out in the kitchen and I am aiming to have him master a simple 3 course meal by the time he is 8. He wears pink and red too. But he knows he is a boy and can differentiate between a man and a woman.
The woman in the article says she will hide the identity of her child for as long as she can and that it is the society, not her child, that she is experimenting with. I just hope that this will not result in serious repercusions in the child's personal development. That the child will really grow up feeling liberated and not totally confused about his/her identity that may have negative impact on his/her self-esteem.
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According to this woman, she wants the child to grow up unhibited by the social expectations of the gender. She does not want him/her to be defined that way and she believes that this is liberating. To practise this non-gender way of parenting, she allows the child to have access to all kinds of toys from barbie dolls to trucks and trains. She also dresses the child up in a dress one day and shirt/trousers in another day. Even when she has to open up a bank account for the child, she hand-draw another box and write "other" instead of ticking "boy" or "girl".
While I can understand the reasoning behind her unorthodox way of parenting, I cannot bring myself to agree with her. Personally, I believe that it is important for a child to grow up with a strong sense of self. An identity to be exact. We cannot change the fact that a child is a boy if he is born that way, and it is necessary that he knows that too. In addition to that, the physical differences between a boy and a girl. I do agree that children should have full access to a wide range of toys but to dress a boy in a girly, frilly dress is, well, just wrong. My 3 year old has a good number of soft toys and he plays with a kid size kitchen. He likes to help out in the kitchen and I am aiming to have him master a simple 3 course meal by the time he is 8. He wears pink and red too. But he knows he is a boy and can differentiate between a man and a woman.
The woman in the article says she will hide the identity of her child for as long as she can and that it is the society, not her child, that she is experimenting with. I just hope that this will not result in serious repercusions in the child's personal development. That the child will really grow up feeling liberated and not totally confused about his/her identity that may have negative impact on his/her self-esteem.
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Monday, October 18, 2010
My busy busy life
Yay...I'm back again! It's nice to be home. Even my 3 year old said "I'm glad to be home mummy" the moment he stepped into the house on Saturday afternoon after almost 18 hours of travelling (flight, bus, taxi etc). For me, I'm happy that we won't be flying again for another 6 months at least.
Since arriving home, I have been busy with chores and working on my evergrowing To-Do list. Despite feeling exhausted from lack of sleep (I slept a little on the overnight flight but was definitely not enough), I had to unpack all our luggage and get all the stuff sorted out. Although I'm definitely no neat freak, there's something about unpacked suitcases lying around the house that disturbs me terribly. Everytime I come back from travelling, I just have to unpack the minute I get home. Immediately.
In the last 48 hours, I have managed to get the following done:
- 4 loads of washing
- grocery enough to feed our family of 3 for the next 3 days
- made 1 breakfast, 1 lunch and 1 dinner
- made a litre yoghurt (I make our own yoghurt with a yoghurt maker at home)
- sorted out Aiden's wardrobe for the change of season (his clothes were in a mess and scattered over several drawers)
- sorted out Aiden's old clothes (the ones I want to keep go into a box and the rest in a bag ready to be dumped)
- confirmed a new cleaning lady and organize for her to start her weekly services tomorrow (yay!)
- plan out the schedule for the cleaning lady for the rest of the year
- register for my japanese course to commence on 16 November (yay, I'm finally gonna pick up the language!)
- plan the itinerary for our friends' visit in December and ourtrip to Hiroshima and Osaka together
- plan the itinerary for Richard's grandfather who will be arriving next Saturday
- make changes to my friend's itinerary (she will be arriving 30 Nov) to accomodate my japanese class schedule and my weeekly domestic help
- caught up with a good friend over emails
Am I efficient or what? So much accomplished in the last 48 hours. I'm damn proud of myself... hee. Oh, and I even found time to update this blog. But now I've got to go put my 4 loads of washing that have been dried away. I will find time to update this blog again if I am not buried alive under that humongous pile of clothes...
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Since arriving home, I have been busy with chores and working on my evergrowing To-Do list. Despite feeling exhausted from lack of sleep (I slept a little on the overnight flight but was definitely not enough), I had to unpack all our luggage and get all the stuff sorted out. Although I'm definitely no neat freak, there's something about unpacked suitcases lying around the house that disturbs me terribly. Everytime I come back from travelling, I just have to unpack the minute I get home. Immediately.
In the last 48 hours, I have managed to get the following done:
- 4 loads of washing
- grocery enough to feed our family of 3 for the next 3 days
- made 1 breakfast, 1 lunch and 1 dinner
- made a litre yoghurt (I make our own yoghurt with a yoghurt maker at home)
- sorted out Aiden's wardrobe for the change of season (his clothes were in a mess and scattered over several drawers)
- sorted out Aiden's old clothes (the ones I want to keep go into a box and the rest in a bag ready to be dumped)
- confirmed a new cleaning lady and organize for her to start her weekly services tomorrow (yay!)
- plan out the schedule for the cleaning lady for the rest of the year
- register for my japanese course to commence on 16 November (yay, I'm finally gonna pick up the language!)
- plan the itinerary for our friends' visit in December and ourtrip to Hiroshima and Osaka together
- plan the itinerary for Richard's grandfather who will be arriving next Saturday
- make changes to my friend's itinerary (she will be arriving 30 Nov) to accomodate my japanese class schedule and my weeekly domestic help
- caught up with a good friend over emails
Am I efficient or what? So much accomplished in the last 48 hours. I'm damn proud of myself... hee. Oh, and I even found time to update this blog. But now I've got to go put my 4 loads of washing that have been dried away. I will find time to update this blog again if I am not buried alive under that humongous pile of clothes...
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Thursday, September 30, 2010
I need to SHOP
The entry today has got nothing to do with the title of this blog. Just some (negative) ramblings of my life but this is my blog and I write whatever I want.
I was in a bitchy mode this morning. I blame it on the lack of sleep. My 3 year old is not feeling well and has been coughing thru the night. I went to bed only close to 2am last night (or should I say this morning) with a heavy heart (will talk more about this later) and got woken up at 5am due to my son's terrible coughing. Went to sleep on his bed to keep him company and never quite got a wink after that. I think I got a total of 3 hours sleep in all. That can very well justify my bitchiness this morning in my opinion.
So what could I do to let my steam off? I called my son's school to inform that he will be absent today. I was hoping that nobody would answer my call so that I could leave a voice message and at the same time remind his principal that she had yet to respond to the email that I sent her 2 days ago. Unfortunately, a teacher answered the phone and I had to talk nicely. But feeling unsatisfied, I decided to send an email directly to the principal after that phone call to remind her in writing that she is supposed to respond to an email that she received 2 days ago. Okay, I did not exactly write that but I think I managed to deliver the message across with professionalism.
This not responding to emails thing is one of my biggest pet peeves. I just cannot stand people who do not use their emails to communicate effectively and professionally. It's fine with taking your sweet time with personal emails from friends but it really isn't right to delay responding to work related emails that had specifically asked for action from you. I have always been very particular with emails and when I was still working in my last job, I dealt with many emails in a day. Even when an email did not require me to action on, I would still respond with a short message just to acknowledge receipt of the mail. And for emails that required me to spend time working on an action before I could give the sender a satisfactory answer, I would at least respond to inform that I was working on it and gave my sender an indication on when he could expect an answer. That, to me is basic email etiquette and professionalism at work. Seriously, how hard is that??
Enough of that.
So like I said, I went to bed late last night with a heavy heart. It was a sad day for Aiden as he played with his bestfriend, D, and his sister for the one last time. D and his family leaves Japan to return to America today. Aiden and D met at school about a year ago and D was the first kid who went to Aiden to say hi. And he tried to scare Aiden by growling but my silly boy thought it was funny and since then, it was all about D. Aiden looks up to D a lot because he is one year older and sometimes, chemistry is a funny thing. He just really, really like this American boy.
Because of the kids, D's mother and I hang out a lot too. She and her husband are really nice and we have been to each other's place for dinner of weekends. I am really feeling sad that I have lost another friend in Japan.
This is the 4th time this year that a friend leaves. I do know many people here but I don't like to call everyone a friend. To me, a friend has to be someone you enjoy spending time with. Someone more than just an acquaintance. I have mentioned many times that it is hard to forge friendships when you live in a foreign country so I'm always happy when I find someone I can call a friend. And so it is hard when these friends leave.
Everytime this happens, I feel like I am taking a bullet. Okay, that may be exaggerating but you get the point. It is always moving on again for me. A part of me is numb but another part of me wonders how long I can handle the downside to living in a foreign land with no family and real, permanent friends.
Maybe it's time to go shopping again.
x
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I was in a bitchy mode this morning. I blame it on the lack of sleep. My 3 year old is not feeling well and has been coughing thru the night. I went to bed only close to 2am last night (or should I say this morning) with a heavy heart (will talk more about this later) and got woken up at 5am due to my son's terrible coughing. Went to sleep on his bed to keep him company and never quite got a wink after that. I think I got a total of 3 hours sleep in all. That can very well justify my bitchiness this morning in my opinion.
So what could I do to let my steam off? I called my son's school to inform that he will be absent today. I was hoping that nobody would answer my call so that I could leave a voice message and at the same time remind his principal that she had yet to respond to the email that I sent her 2 days ago. Unfortunately, a teacher answered the phone and I had to talk nicely. But feeling unsatisfied, I decided to send an email directly to the principal after that phone call to remind her in writing that she is supposed to respond to an email that she received 2 days ago. Okay, I did not exactly write that but I think I managed to deliver the message across with professionalism.
This not responding to emails thing is one of my biggest pet peeves. I just cannot stand people who do not use their emails to communicate effectively and professionally. It's fine with taking your sweet time with personal emails from friends but it really isn't right to delay responding to work related emails that had specifically asked for action from you. I have always been very particular with emails and when I was still working in my last job, I dealt with many emails in a day. Even when an email did not require me to action on, I would still respond with a short message just to acknowledge receipt of the mail. And for emails that required me to spend time working on an action before I could give the sender a satisfactory answer, I would at least respond to inform that I was working on it and gave my sender an indication on when he could expect an answer. That, to me is basic email etiquette and professionalism at work. Seriously, how hard is that??
Enough of that.
So like I said, I went to bed late last night with a heavy heart. It was a sad day for Aiden as he played with his bestfriend, D, and his sister for the one last time. D and his family leaves Japan to return to America today. Aiden and D met at school about a year ago and D was the first kid who went to Aiden to say hi. And he tried to scare Aiden by growling but my silly boy thought it was funny and since then, it was all about D. Aiden looks up to D a lot because he is one year older and sometimes, chemistry is a funny thing. He just really, really like this American boy.
Because of the kids, D's mother and I hang out a lot too. She and her husband are really nice and we have been to each other's place for dinner of weekends. I am really feeling sad that I have lost another friend in Japan.
This is the 4th time this year that a friend leaves. I do know many people here but I don't like to call everyone a friend. To me, a friend has to be someone you enjoy spending time with. Someone more than just an acquaintance. I have mentioned many times that it is hard to forge friendships when you live in a foreign country so I'm always happy when I find someone I can call a friend. And so it is hard when these friends leave.
Everytime this happens, I feel like I am taking a bullet. Okay, that may be exaggerating but you get the point. It is always moving on again for me. A part of me is numb but another part of me wonders how long I can handle the downside to living in a foreign land with no family and real, permanent friends.
Maybe it's time to go shopping again.
x
x
Friday, September 17, 2010
Life on a choo-choo train
I sat infront of my pc this morning, trying to find the motivation to write. I have been busy with setting up this new place and this week has been taken up by invitations to sayonara (farewell in japanese) parties and a birthday celebration. It doesn't help that we are travelling again in 2 weeks time (back to Australia) which means I have so much on my "To Do" list that constantly occupy my mind. I also blame my lack of blog updates on the location of our work desk in this new place. Must be the fengshui no good.
I was looking at my calendar yesterday and it suddenly dawned on me that there are only 3.5 months left in this year. Where did the past 9.5 months go? I remember being young and always wanting to grow up fast. Now in my mid thirties, life seems to be going at a scarily fast pace. The next couple of months are going to be eaten up by many activities again - 2 weeks in Oz, Halloween party in end october, Granddad's visit in november, a pal's visit in early december, Aiden's year end school function, our best friends visiting from Oz etc. And very soon it will be 2011... And I will be 35. OH.MY.GOD.
On a positive note, I really do enjoy having so much to look forward to in my life. And I'm not hard to please at all. Thinking about events like my brother-in-law's wedding (because weddings are beautiful) and seeing my 3 year old dress up for Halloween makes me smile. And I am again reminded to live life with passion. And hope.
Here's a piece of raw chocolate tart that I made sometime back. Have a very sweet weekend!
I was looking at my calendar yesterday and it suddenly dawned on me that there are only 3.5 months left in this year. Where did the past 9.5 months go? I remember being young and always wanting to grow up fast. Now in my mid thirties, life seems to be going at a scarily fast pace. The next couple of months are going to be eaten up by many activities again - 2 weeks in Oz, Halloween party in end october, Granddad's visit in november, a pal's visit in early december, Aiden's year end school function, our best friends visiting from Oz etc. And very soon it will be 2011... And I will be 35. OH.MY.GOD.
On a positive note, I really do enjoy having so much to look forward to in my life. And I'm not hard to please at all. Thinking about events like my brother-in-law's wedding (because weddings are beautiful) and seeing my 3 year old dress up for Halloween makes me smile. And I am again reminded to live life with passion. And hope.
Here's a piece of raw chocolate tart that I made sometime back. Have a very sweet weekend!
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
New Beginning?
I have been so so busy since we got back from Singapore that I haven't even had time to breathe properly. Almost straight after we arrive back in Yokohama, we started packing up the apartment instead of unpacking our luggage. We were moving to a house in 7 days and there were lots to do. Collected the keys last wednesday and I started moving some personal items like clothes and shoes by myself over 2 days when Aiden was at school. Then came Friday, the actual moving day. We had movers who started work at 8am on Friday morning. They had to make 3 trips between the old apartment and the new house (thank god these locations are not far from each other). They didn't finish the job until almost 11pm that night!
This move has made me realise how much stuff our family of 3 own. Seriously way too much. I'm quite turned off by myself honestly. We (mainly me I guess) have been accumulating things everytime we move and we have moved 6 times (including this round) since 2005. This is probably more than some people have moved in their whole lifetime! My husband and I are now so efficient in moving that we can now claim to be experts in this area. But I am really really tired. Hopefully we can stay up in this house for at least the next 2 years. Doesn't sound hard does it?
Many people have asked why we have to make our lives so difficult. Well, in the past we had to move between countries because we accepted overseas job offers for the sake of our family's future. Our move this time is for several reasons. Our previous apartment is beautiful and very large by japanese standards. But it is not serving our needs very well. Our 3 year old is an active, developing boy and we don't want to have to restrain him from some of the physical activities (like running and jumping) at home just because we fear disturbing the neighbours. Also, we have been having so many visitors and it will be nice to have the extra space. This new place is great. We finally have our own garage again. And we even have a roof terrace with great views of the neighbourhood. The move was by far the hardest we have ever done but we were mentally prepared for it. I know many people do not like moving because it can be so exhausting and frustrating but I am not the type who will let these reasons stop me from having a nicer home to live in. After all, it was only one week of stress and exhaustion which will be over.
The one good thing that has come out of this move is that after seeing so much stuff I own, I have decided that perhaps I should really stop buying. Haha, I know some people are laughing at me. Well, at least give me credit for saying that I want to try. Maybe I should stop buying clothes and shoes and just save up my money to invest in another good bag. Perhaps a jumbo 2.55??
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This move has made me realise how much stuff our family of 3 own. Seriously way too much. I'm quite turned off by myself honestly. We (mainly me I guess) have been accumulating things everytime we move and we have moved 6 times (including this round) since 2005. This is probably more than some people have moved in their whole lifetime! My husband and I are now so efficient in moving that we can now claim to be experts in this area. But I am really really tired. Hopefully we can stay up in this house for at least the next 2 years. Doesn't sound hard does it?
Many people have asked why we have to make our lives so difficult. Well, in the past we had to move between countries because we accepted overseas job offers for the sake of our family's future. Our move this time is for several reasons. Our previous apartment is beautiful and very large by japanese standards. But it is not serving our needs very well. Our 3 year old is an active, developing boy and we don't want to have to restrain him from some of the physical activities (like running and jumping) at home just because we fear disturbing the neighbours. Also, we have been having so many visitors and it will be nice to have the extra space. This new place is great. We finally have our own garage again. And we even have a roof terrace with great views of the neighbourhood. The move was by far the hardest we have ever done but we were mentally prepared for it. I know many people do not like moving because it can be so exhausting and frustrating but I am not the type who will let these reasons stop me from having a nicer home to live in. After all, it was only one week of stress and exhaustion which will be over.
The one good thing that has come out of this move is that after seeing so much stuff I own, I have decided that perhaps I should really stop buying. Haha, I know some people are laughing at me. Well, at least give me credit for saying that I want to try. Maybe I should stop buying clothes and shoes and just save up my money to invest in another good bag. Perhaps a jumbo 2.55??
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Tuesday, August 31, 2010
A Beautiful Observation
One of the things I enjoy doing in my daily life in Japan is taking my 3 year old to the local playground. We are very lucky to be living in a neighbourhood surrounded by beautiful parks and children's playgrounds that are all accessible by foot within minutes. Besides spending good quality time with my little boy, taking walks like these always bring about new discoveries that can be inspiring. And that was what happened yesterday.
It was hot and humid so I decided to take Aiden to the playground earlier in the morning. The place was quiet except for an old man with a boy (probably about 3 or 4 year old) who was playing in the sandpit. The man looked like he was in his 60s so I guessed he was probably the grandfather. Shortly after we arrived, they started preparing to leave (hope we were not the reason!). The grandfather washed and packed up all the sandpit toys and proceeded to clean the boy up. He opened up a bag that contained some towels and fresh new clothes, and used the water from the tap at the playground, meticulously cleaning up the boy who had sand all over his body. Then he dressed him up with the fresh clean clothes and sat him down, giving him a drink and some crackers to snack on.
I was very moved as I sat there watching. The silent bond between a grandfather and a child. The tender care by the grandfather. The smile on the boy's face as he sat down in his clean outfit, eating the snacks. It was all so sweet. And very very inspiring.
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It was hot and humid so I decided to take Aiden to the playground earlier in the morning. The place was quiet except for an old man with a boy (probably about 3 or 4 year old) who was playing in the sandpit. The man looked like he was in his 60s so I guessed he was probably the grandfather. Shortly after we arrived, they started preparing to leave (hope we were not the reason!). The grandfather washed and packed up all the sandpit toys and proceeded to clean the boy up. He opened up a bag that contained some towels and fresh new clothes, and used the water from the tap at the playground, meticulously cleaning up the boy who had sand all over his body. Then he dressed him up with the fresh clean clothes and sat him down, giving him a drink and some crackers to snack on.
I was very moved as I sat there watching. The silent bond between a grandfather and a child. The tender care by the grandfather. The smile on the boy's face as he sat down in his clean outfit, eating the snacks. It was all so sweet. And very very inspiring.
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Monday, August 30, 2010
I'm back!
It's nice to be home, although I haven't had a real home for the past 3 years due to my husband's work that resulted in us having to move from country to country. We have been living in Yokohama since January 2009 and for some reason, this city feels so much like home to me. Everytime I travel back to either Perth or Singapore, I find myself missing Japan. We just spent 3 weeks in Singapore and got back on Friday night. I went to my favourite local supermarket this morning and felt so happy the minute I stepped into the store. The trolleys, the aisles, and the overall familiarity with where everything was, I miss these so much.
Spending 3 weeks in my home country was nice but stressful and very exhausting as usual. My husband could only join us for the last week so I was pretty much a single parent for the first 2 weeks. It was tough since my 3 year old is no angel. My parents found it hard to manage him when I wasn't there but I really needed the time to catch up with my close friends. For most of my outings with friends that didn't include Aiden, I was often interrupted by phone calls from home, or distracted by worries about how my parents were coping without me. Still, I tried to make the best of the limited time I had with friends I have been missing dearly. We got to meet, shop, eat, drink, and laugh together. Good times.
Apart from missing family, the hardest thing about moving away from my home country for me is giving up my social life. My girlfriends have always been a big part of my life and I am very blessed to have found many whom I can count as close friends. The biggest excitement for me whenever I land in Singapore is the thought of seeing these friends and doing girly things together again. These moments seem even more precious this trip as I have a feeling that it could be the last time I get to hang out with them and reminisce on good old times. It may be awhile before I return to Singapore again. And when I do, I may be a mother of 2 so that means there is no way I can leave kids at home with my parents who are also growing older. Nobody knows what the future holds. The only thing I could do during this trip was to cherish every moment I had with the people I love.
Time to move on again.
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Spending 3 weeks in my home country was nice but stressful and very exhausting as usual. My husband could only join us for the last week so I was pretty much a single parent for the first 2 weeks. It was tough since my 3 year old is no angel. My parents found it hard to manage him when I wasn't there but I really needed the time to catch up with my close friends. For most of my outings with friends that didn't include Aiden, I was often interrupted by phone calls from home, or distracted by worries about how my parents were coping without me. Still, I tried to make the best of the limited time I had with friends I have been missing dearly. We got to meet, shop, eat, drink, and laugh together. Good times.
Apart from missing family, the hardest thing about moving away from my home country for me is giving up my social life. My girlfriends have always been a big part of my life and I am very blessed to have found many whom I can count as close friends. The biggest excitement for me whenever I land in Singapore is the thought of seeing these friends and doing girly things together again. These moments seem even more precious this trip as I have a feeling that it could be the last time I get to hang out with them and reminisce on good old times. It may be awhile before I return to Singapore again. And when I do, I may be a mother of 2 so that means there is no way I can leave kids at home with my parents who are also growing older. Nobody knows what the future holds. The only thing I could do during this trip was to cherish every moment I had with the people I love.
Time to move on again.
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Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Not everyday is a Sunday
I have been very tired these couple of days. Japan's summer is freaking hot this year. Just think Australia's summer sun + Singapore's humidity. I'm dying in this 37/38 deg humidity everyday. And perhaps the heat has also done something to Aiden's behaviour for he has been increasingly challenging. He is literally driving me crazy and I so wish some samaritan will appear to take me to another planet where I can have some peace. Somewhere cool.
I'm going back to Singapore next Friday but a big part of me is not too excited about it. The thought of 1.5 hr on a bus with Aiden to Narita Airport and another 7 hours of flight is already stressing me up. It is not the first time I do this of course but going to Singapore has always been fairly stressful. Even after I overcome the journey there, there is always the stress of leaving Aiden with my parents when I meet my friends for catch up. My parents can never seem to manage him. Some friends have requested that I bring him along to the outings but seriously, what is the point of catching up with friends when I cannot even eat or talk with him by my side? I am more likely to be distracted or running after him as he can't sit still at the table.
I really don't like the idea of negative content or complaining about life on this blog. I just need to release some steam when things get rough. The last few days have not been smooth but I will be back tomorrow with some positive stuff.
Life is still beautiful. At least I have 3 aircon units blasting away in my lounge room.
I'm going back to Singapore next Friday but a big part of me is not too excited about it. The thought of 1.5 hr on a bus with Aiden to Narita Airport and another 7 hours of flight is already stressing me up. It is not the first time I do this of course but going to Singapore has always been fairly stressful. Even after I overcome the journey there, there is always the stress of leaving Aiden with my parents when I meet my friends for catch up. My parents can never seem to manage him. Some friends have requested that I bring him along to the outings but seriously, what is the point of catching up with friends when I cannot even eat or talk with him by my side? I am more likely to be distracted or running after him as he can't sit still at the table.
I really don't like the idea of negative content or complaining about life on this blog. I just need to release some steam when things get rough. The last few days have not been smooth but I will be back tomorrow with some positive stuff.
Life is still beautiful. At least I have 3 aircon units blasting away in my lounge room.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Smelling the Roses
I have lived in 3 countries (and worked in 2 of them) in my life. I was born and raised in Singapore. Moved to Perth, Western Australia, in 2005 after my husband and I got married. In 2007, I resigned from my job in Perth and moved back to Singapore (where my husband accepted a work assignment) just before giving birth to Aiden. And in early 2009, we relocated to Japan because my husband accepted a job offer that contracted him for a year. We extended our contract here in January this year and will probably be in Japan until God knows when.
Being educated in Singapore, I am very used to the pressure cooker style of life. The pace in Singapore is very fast and life can be hectic. People are competitive. The whole nation is forever in pursuit of a so called "better life", generally translated as "life with material comforts". It's like if you live in a big house, I want to live in a bigger one. For this, people work very hard just so they can satisfy their material wants. This becomes a vicious cycle where the whole nation simply gets trapped in this hectic, stressful lifestyle where people tend to put all their energy into pursuing their careers and everything else in life becomes secondary.
It was only after I moved to Perth that I finally found the meaning of family life. To me, Perth is like a country city. It is very quiet. I could finish work at 5pm. My bosses respected my personal time and family life. And for the first time, I got acquainted with nature. I found work very shortly after I moved to Perth. Since we had no children at that time, and the city is quiet with not much to do anyway, I pretty much focused my energy on furthering my career. For that 2 years, I enjoyed my work a lot but towards the end of my time there, I got fairly stressed up with several work challenges and juggling 2 roles at the same time. It also didn't help that I was pregnant then.
At present, I have been living here in Japan for 18 months. I am not able to work here because I can't speak the language. Besides, I have a child to look after and I don't have family to rely on. As an expat, it is also hard to forge any good, solid friendships as the other expats come and go all the time. Everytime I thought I have found someone I can click with, she informs that she is leaving soon. I have no family here, and neither do I have any actual real friends. When I go to the shops, I cannot understand what the locals say to me most of the time. Neither can they understand my almost non-existent grasp of the japanese language. So why am I still always saying that I enjoy living in Japan?
Because for the first time in my life, I feel that I have finally slowed down. My situation in Japan has forced me to slow down. I go to the playgrounds with Aiden and we count the crawling ants together. When he is happy playing the slides by himself, I sit on the bench and read. When I'm not reading, I watch and observe the other mothers and kids at the park. Aiden and I take walks in the neighbourhood and we talk about the birds and changing seasons. I see some mothers cycling past me with a child in her backseat and I watch and observe in awe how they can balance so well with shopping bags infront and a toddler at the back. I channel all my time and energy in nurturing my child and taking care of my husband. I get to witness all of Aiden's milestones. And I get to enjoy his hugs and kisses thru out the day.
There are always so many ways to look at a situation. My life in Japan may be described as lonely if I want to look at it negatively. But in my opinion, I am finally enjoying life. And it is a really nice feeling to be able to slow down and take notice of the flowers on the street.
Being educated in Singapore, I am very used to the pressure cooker style of life. The pace in Singapore is very fast and life can be hectic. People are competitive. The whole nation is forever in pursuit of a so called "better life", generally translated as "life with material comforts". It's like if you live in a big house, I want to live in a bigger one. For this, people work very hard just so they can satisfy their material wants. This becomes a vicious cycle where the whole nation simply gets trapped in this hectic, stressful lifestyle where people tend to put all their energy into pursuing their careers and everything else in life becomes secondary.
It was only after I moved to Perth that I finally found the meaning of family life. To me, Perth is like a country city. It is very quiet. I could finish work at 5pm. My bosses respected my personal time and family life. And for the first time, I got acquainted with nature. I found work very shortly after I moved to Perth. Since we had no children at that time, and the city is quiet with not much to do anyway, I pretty much focused my energy on furthering my career. For that 2 years, I enjoyed my work a lot but towards the end of my time there, I got fairly stressed up with several work challenges and juggling 2 roles at the same time. It also didn't help that I was pregnant then.
At present, I have been living here in Japan for 18 months. I am not able to work here because I can't speak the language. Besides, I have a child to look after and I don't have family to rely on. As an expat, it is also hard to forge any good, solid friendships as the other expats come and go all the time. Everytime I thought I have found someone I can click with, she informs that she is leaving soon. I have no family here, and neither do I have any actual real friends. When I go to the shops, I cannot understand what the locals say to me most of the time. Neither can they understand my almost non-existent grasp of the japanese language. So why am I still always saying that I enjoy living in Japan?
Because for the first time in my life, I feel that I have finally slowed down. My situation in Japan has forced me to slow down. I go to the playgrounds with Aiden and we count the crawling ants together. When he is happy playing the slides by himself, I sit on the bench and read. When I'm not reading, I watch and observe the other mothers and kids at the park. Aiden and I take walks in the neighbourhood and we talk about the birds and changing seasons. I see some mothers cycling past me with a child in her backseat and I watch and observe in awe how they can balance so well with shopping bags infront and a toddler at the back. I channel all my time and energy in nurturing my child and taking care of my husband. I get to witness all of Aiden's milestones. And I get to enjoy his hugs and kisses thru out the day.
There are always so many ways to look at a situation. My life in Japan may be described as lonely if I want to look at it negatively. But in my opinion, I am finally enjoying life. And it is a really nice feeling to be able to slow down and take notice of the flowers on the street.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
A day in my life
5 July 2010 (Monday)
7.45am
Woke up. Prepared Aiden’s lunchbox for school.
8.45am
Dropped Aiden off at school.
9.00am
Grocery shopping.
10.00am – 11.00am
Back home. General cleaning of the house, laundry, and preparations for the dinner (I was planning an Indian meal with tandoori chicken for the night. The chicken had to be marinated for at least 6 hours and not longer than 8 hours so my timing had to be right). Cleaned up the kitchen.
11.00am – 11.30am
Shower, make-up and got dressed to go shopping (I needed to shop for some presents and to make a trip to Longchamp as they were having a sale).
12.00am – 1.30pm
Shopping (since I had only 1.5hr to shop, I decided to skip lunch as shopping was definitely more important).
2pm
Pick Aiden up from school.
2.15pm
Back home. Aiden had his afterschool snacks and watched the TV. I sat infront of the computer to surf the web (check emails, update my blog, read international news, read up on some of my favourite blogs etc). Chatted with a friend from Singapore over skype.
3.15pm – 5pm
Sat down with Aiden to do some activities. Made a scrapbook together. Printed out some superman characters from the computer to do some colouring. Did some cutting and pasting together.
5pm – 6.30pm
Prepare for dinner. Running between the living room (helping Aiden with his activities) and kitchen (cooking). Dealt with some occasional tantrums from Aiden.
7pm
Husband is home. Sat down for dinner.
7.30pm – 8pm
Cleaning up (washed dishes and mopped the floor).
8pm – 9pm
Surf the web while my husband spent time with Aiden.
9pm – 10pm
Prepare for my husband’s lunch box and fruit bowls for the next day. Washed dishes AGAIN.
10pm
The 2 boys went to bed. I could finally relax.
10pm – 12am
Surf the web AGAIN (yes, i do spend alot of time online) with the TV in the background.
12am
I started seeing stars. Crash!
7.45am
Woke up. Prepared Aiden’s lunchbox for school.
8.45am
Dropped Aiden off at school.
9.00am
Grocery shopping.
10.00am – 11.00am
Back home. General cleaning of the house, laundry, and preparations for the dinner (I was planning an Indian meal with tandoori chicken for the night. The chicken had to be marinated for at least 6 hours and not longer than 8 hours so my timing had to be right). Cleaned up the kitchen.
11.00am – 11.30am
Shower, make-up and got dressed to go shopping (I needed to shop for some presents and to make a trip to Longchamp as they were having a sale).
12.00am – 1.30pm
Shopping (since I had only 1.5hr to shop, I decided to skip lunch as shopping was definitely more important).
2pm
Pick Aiden up from school.
2.15pm
Back home. Aiden had his afterschool snacks and watched the TV. I sat infront of the computer to surf the web (check emails, update my blog, read international news, read up on some of my favourite blogs etc). Chatted with a friend from Singapore over skype.
3.15pm – 5pm
Sat down with Aiden to do some activities. Made a scrapbook together. Printed out some superman characters from the computer to do some colouring. Did some cutting and pasting together.
5pm – 6.30pm
Prepare for dinner. Running between the living room (helping Aiden with his activities) and kitchen (cooking). Dealt with some occasional tantrums from Aiden.
7pm
Husband is home. Sat down for dinner.
7.30pm – 8pm
Cleaning up (washed dishes and mopped the floor).
8pm – 9pm
Surf the web while my husband spent time with Aiden.
9pm – 10pm
Prepare for my husband’s lunch box and fruit bowls for the next day. Washed dishes AGAIN.
10pm
The 2 boys went to bed. I could finally relax.
10pm – 12am
Surf the web AGAIN (yes, i do spend alot of time online) with the TV in the background.
12am
I started seeing stars. Crash!
Monday, June 28, 2010
Perhaps it's about time for a medal
So I have finally watched the movie Sex and The City 2 last Saturday. Wasn't looking forward to the plot (they really should have wrapped up the series with the first movie in my opinion) but which gal can resist the clothes, bags, shoes and all the glamour? The storyline was really just blah but there was a part where Charlotte and Miranda were having a drink by the bar and sharing their downs about motherhood that struck a chord with me.
In the movie, Charlotte was suppressing her frustrations of being a mother with a 5 year old and a 2 year old who were always crying. Miranda emphatized by sharing how despite loving her son dearly, she missed working and being a mother wasn't enough for her. Charlotte then went on to reveal how her girls drove her crazy everyday and sometimes she would just run into a seperate room and leave her 2 year old to cry by herself.
Watching this scene brought a tear to my eyes. I felt as though I had met some good friends who were in the same predicament as me and totally understand how I have been feeling for the past 3 years. Don't get me wrong. I love my son dearly and will never give him up for anything. I am happy and proud to be a mother, but there were times when stress got into me and I would seriously want to just tear my hair out.
Aiden was a very challenging baby for the first year of his life. It didn't help that he was a little colicky and the condition settled down when he was about 4 months old. To make this worse, he was a baby that didn't require much sleep day AND night. In fact, he really only started sleeping through the night when he was about 2.
I used to tell people that my baby didn't cry. He screamed. I can really relate to what Charlotte said in the movie about how she left her girl to cry sometimes. I did that too. In fact, I begged for Aiden to stop screaming when he was a baby. My husband was at work and my mum wasn't with me. I was stuck at home with the screaming monster and I was exhausted. So I begged him to stop crying. When he didn't, I went into another room, locked myself inside and cried too.
Being a mother is a very humbling experience. It let you discover things you never knew about yourself. Before Aiden came along, all I had was my life and my career. Everything was about me. I knew motherhood was going to be challenging but I didn't know it was that hard. I felt I had lost control over everything. I could not manage Aiden and also struggeled with breastfeeding. I missed my job and my life. In the first few months, I fell into postnatal blues. I wasn't suicidal on a daily basis but at my lowest, I did think of throwing myself out of the windows of my 16th floor apartment with my baby. I have had my fair share of ups and downs in my life but for the first time, I was struggling with something. I had kinda lost control of myself. I knew I had a problem but seeking professional help wasn't what I felt I needed. I wanted to rely on what was left of my rational mind and bring out the resilience in me that I had lost along the way in that first year of motherhood. By the time Aiden turned 1, I was on the road to being my normal self again.
Today, I am proud to say that I have come a very long way. Living in a foreign land (where you don't even speak the language) and away from friends and family is much harder than one can imagine. From a career driven woman who was quite a domestic disaster at home, I am now able to juggle housework, spend time with my son and need only an hour for preparing dinner from cooking to cleaning up.
So the reason for this post? Well I am finally at the stage where I can confidently say I am comfortable and happy with where I am. But I know me. Being a mother is fufilling but not enough. Sometimes I need a break from the role and remember what makes me as a person. I am a woman with many interests and I like to live my life with passion. Writing this blog is enjoyable and it gives me a platform to share what I love with people that are dear to me. It is also a constant reminder to never lose myself again. Living a balanced and fulfilling life while juggling my roles (as a wife, mother and daughter) and pursing my interests is what I strive for at this point of my life.
Now going back to the movie, Charlotte said she wondered how some women can do without help as a housewife and a mother (she had a full time and lived-in nanny). I nudged my husband at that point and asked if I could have a medal.
In the movie, Charlotte was suppressing her frustrations of being a mother with a 5 year old and a 2 year old who were always crying. Miranda emphatized by sharing how despite loving her son dearly, she missed working and being a mother wasn't enough for her. Charlotte then went on to reveal how her girls drove her crazy everyday and sometimes she would just run into a seperate room and leave her 2 year old to cry by herself.
Watching this scene brought a tear to my eyes. I felt as though I had met some good friends who were in the same predicament as me and totally understand how I have been feeling for the past 3 years. Don't get me wrong. I love my son dearly and will never give him up for anything. I am happy and proud to be a mother, but there were times when stress got into me and I would seriously want to just tear my hair out.
Aiden was a very challenging baby for the first year of his life. It didn't help that he was a little colicky and the condition settled down when he was about 4 months old. To make this worse, he was a baby that didn't require much sleep day AND night. In fact, he really only started sleeping through the night when he was about 2.
I used to tell people that my baby didn't cry. He screamed. I can really relate to what Charlotte said in the movie about how she left her girl to cry sometimes. I did that too. In fact, I begged for Aiden to stop screaming when he was a baby. My husband was at work and my mum wasn't with me. I was stuck at home with the screaming monster and I was exhausted. So I begged him to stop crying. When he didn't, I went into another room, locked myself inside and cried too.
Being a mother is a very humbling experience. It let you discover things you never knew about yourself. Before Aiden came along, all I had was my life and my career. Everything was about me. I knew motherhood was going to be challenging but I didn't know it was that hard. I felt I had lost control over everything. I could not manage Aiden and also struggeled with breastfeeding. I missed my job and my life. In the first few months, I fell into postnatal blues. I wasn't suicidal on a daily basis but at my lowest, I did think of throwing myself out of the windows of my 16th floor apartment with my baby. I have had my fair share of ups and downs in my life but for the first time, I was struggling with something. I had kinda lost control of myself. I knew I had a problem but seeking professional help wasn't what I felt I needed. I wanted to rely on what was left of my rational mind and bring out the resilience in me that I had lost along the way in that first year of motherhood. By the time Aiden turned 1, I was on the road to being my normal self again.
Today, I am proud to say that I have come a very long way. Living in a foreign land (where you don't even speak the language) and away from friends and family is much harder than one can imagine. From a career driven woman who was quite a domestic disaster at home, I am now able to juggle housework, spend time with my son and need only an hour for preparing dinner from cooking to cleaning up.
So the reason for this post? Well I am finally at the stage where I can confidently say I am comfortable and happy with where I am. But I know me. Being a mother is fufilling but not enough. Sometimes I need a break from the role and remember what makes me as a person. I am a woman with many interests and I like to live my life with passion. Writing this blog is enjoyable and it gives me a platform to share what I love with people that are dear to me. It is also a constant reminder to never lose myself again. Living a balanced and fulfilling life while juggling my roles (as a wife, mother and daughter) and pursing my interests is what I strive for at this point of my life.
Now going back to the movie, Charlotte said she wondered how some women can do without help as a housewife and a mother (she had a full time and lived-in nanny). I nudged my husband at that point and asked if I could have a medal.
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